///girulento

the raw material of beauty

2012-02-02T11:34:00.000+01:00

"Modern men is brutally vested with means to comprehend what mix of violence, anguish, and anxiety of the sacred, desire, desperation, degradation, the search for love, and animal objection there is in his own matter and how this necessarily constitutes the raw material of beauty. "

Luigi Ficacci talking about Francis Bacon work.

roaming around inside

2012-02-01T22:31:00.001+01:00

Books are pieces of beings, that can culminate on ones beings... I like to collect this pieces. There are sort of fragments of people inside to be discovered, something of endless possibility and beauty.
Is what happens when different worlds meet, another of those "beings" born by this confluence, like the way that babies are conceived, by mixing parts of people.

Isn´t the mixture of stimulus that create or unfold states?Maybe is how this body can grasp a diverse body; by encounters.

Multiply in different somebodies. Observe the own beings. Meet the own monsters.

Todays rehearsal - starting when asked to dance my dance:

2012-01-30T23:22:00.001+01:00

Images are being formed of people and objects and places around us,and yet, for a brief period which may seem all too long, the sense of self is missing and no individual ownership of thought is apparent.
Little or nothing was in fact going on the mind in such circumstance. Be distracted was a need. All became residual performance.

"Nothing on me is original. I am the combine effort of everybody I´ve ever known" (Chuck Palahniuk)

Blackout.

Absence as state, created the encounter of a sort of edge or bound....
In this episode; where to begin ?

Departing from were it was: stare blankly, eyesfocused on nothing, face devoid of any expression—a meaningless mask; the muscular tone would be preserved, state of suspended animation, waiting for a different sense than the vision to awake...
The surroundings were made of unknown — from then, different scenarios unrolled with shots of emotional bombs ordered on a list that make arouse loneliness.

Talk about the wether - good bye, time to stretch and have dinner at Castro.

buzz

2012-01-24T21:13:00.000+01:00

I have no idea

What I am - I am doing

Where I am - I am going

What I want - I am caressing

What I care - I am needing

Whats the difference - I am wondering

All is the same - all becomes the same thing, and dissolves to turn into a part of nothing.

Same things - Machines

Sometimes - Noise

Skin - Glue

I watch you - that I transformed in air

Keep it alone - delusions to own

Looking - love that belongs to someone else

being - just among others

lovers

There was this night where figures became the same - dissolve

absurds that I might wish - portions of invisible

broken soul

feelings - anestesia

I have no idea

what I chase - i am receiving

How I react - I am not enough

There was this afternoon that I assumed the being of a dead animal

I faille on seeing starts

I faille long nights

I faille hope

I faille love

There was this morning with the consistence of the rotting things. They expand before disappear.

The muscles of my sleeping disappear.

I spend days:

- stepping in black

- reflecting about ghost towns

- constructing calmness

- having imaginary dialogs

- whitening my bones

- collecting sensations

- using things that are not mine

- belonging triggers

- living things that never happened

- having impossible people

- making alive hidden places

- missing things that never exist

- creating ideal situations on my head

I have no idea

There was that dawn in witch all that I spill became cloud. From this time on all that I know had moved away from me.

I make things see like they are.

Lonely.

Scape from the own desire is a supreme act of cowardice.

but...

2012-01-23T19:43:00.004+01:00

a lot I cant explain...

Observe

2012-01-21T18:26:00.000+01:00

How I construct movement?

-there is a whole line of thoughts to be developed here, last night I felt free and today dance was easy-

while eating banana - random notes - HODWORKS rehearsals

2012-01-15T00:33:00.000+01:00

commit

delicate violence

walking in the ceiling

press the flesh to love

undo

give nick names

bring things to the invisible

a whole has a big impact

one can be a whole

shapes that dream

subtlety agressions

dare the wall

trigger

transforming matter in air

push a bad set away

relate to the space

understand noise

relate with the invisible

don't resist the floor

meaning is something you give

count your breath

deal with dead cats

indulge

be a kinetic collector

beauty is a view point

crack the ankle

intimate group experience

learn about birds

no imitate: be

have words on your mouth

hidden things swing

state of tree

imagine a room full of things

appear

always on four

disappear

beyond dance

imaginary dialogs

persist ahead the bound

body cooperation

the length of sensation

language of images

time of feelings

grabbing vertebrae

get hight with no extra

cotton

things that don exist

poetics of a monster

things rotten

observe

care about your eyes

the absurd makes me company

concessions and agreements

work in pajamas

nothing that you need to active

voice to desires

jitters

follow the white rabbit

something that you need to listening

urgency

waves of concentration and moods

make believe

trust fragility

forget good or bad

confessions for ghosts

help the motor

shake the soul

smell the flesh

share power

be a black instrument

relation is an investment

listening the silence

keep the wonder

trick

everything we can´t see is beautiful

pleasure as a rule

share chocolate

try out

learn to use chopsticks

feed your curiosity

hug

2012

2012-01-02T00:49:00.002+01:00

LIST OF RESOLUTIONS 2012

Architecting a bunny

2011-12-30T21:55:00.003+01:00

More at http://queerrabbit.blogspot.com

Andrew Salgado

2011-12-29T13:34:00.001+01:00

Sunshine :)

2011-12-25T22:40:00.000+01:00

2011-12-25T02:51:00.000+01:00

"I dont wanna demand anything
but I want let you know"

how come this again?

wt shall I do? I dont wanna things to change... but if I talk the will change, the fact of knowing about something already make I change the way I place myself...you...
the fact of admit to myself is already making things change...

I need to find me some excuses.

I hope will be fine
I mind if doesnt.

I wish I had supernatural powers...

stupid me.

side of the things

2011-12-24T16:33:00.003+01:00

state of things

things of state

texture of sound

sound of texture

gift of time

time of gift

feelings of grated

granted of feelings

accesses of love

love of accesses

points of respect

respect of points

noise of silences

silences of noise

sharing of unknown

unknown of sharing

hold of bodies

bodies of hold

weight of wait

wait of weight

inward of words

words of inwards

processes of allowance

allowance of processes

shape of colors

colors of shape

vibration of landscapes

landscapes of vibration

movement of patience

patience of movement

imagination of hope

hope of imagination

dialog of listenings

listening of dialogs

2011-12-23T19:21:00.000+01:00

2011-12-15T23:41:00.001+01:00

count your breath

love it

2011-12-15T08:49:00.002+01:00

2011-12-12T08:51:00.001+01:00

❝ The life of the cultivated mind should be private, reticent, discreet: Most of its celebrations will occur with no audience, because there can be no applause for that moment when the solitary reader gets up and paces round the room, having just noticed the hidden image in the sonnet, or the profane joke in the devotional text, or the secret message in the prison diaries. ❞

Christopher Hitchens

From the blog sadnesses

all this stuff

2011-12-10T00:40:00.001+01:00

Tomorrow is my first day of work...
I just move to Budapest...

There is a mixture of gratefulness, excitement, fear, and all the paradoxical feeling gathering together and doing a big party inside.

Im so much looking forward for the gift of being on a studio.

Is time to practice and use my theories of range of freedom, I wanna give it all.

I love to be where I am.
:)

2011-12-02T14:00:00.001+01:00

Maybe Im falling on fragility. Fragility of loneliness

nothing really make any sense at all...

...

2011-12-02T10:46:00.001+01:00

I am lost, in our rainbow, now our rainbow has gone,

Overcast, by your shadow, as our worlds move on,

But in this shirt, I can be you, to be near you for a while,

There's a crane, knocking down all those things, that we were,

I awake, in the night, to hear the engines purr,

There's a pain, it does ripple through my frame, makes me lame,

There's a thorn, in my side, it's the shame, it's the pride...

Of you and me, ever changing, moving on now, moving fast,

And his touch, must be wanted, must become, through your ask,

But I need Jake to tell you, that I love you, it never rests,

And I've bled every day now, for a year, for a year,

I did send you a note on the wind for to read....

... Our names there together must have fallen like a seed...

... To the depths of the soil buried deep in the ground,

On the wind, I could hear you, call my name, held the sounds,

I am lost,

I am lost, in our rainbow, now our rainbow has gone,

I am lost.

(In This Shirt : the irrepressibles)

Im...

2011-12-01T15:09:00.001+01:00

There is a funny feeling, maybe is the fact of moving from city again and rearranging things, maybe is the fact of looking the people I have met until today and wish for them good... and feel glad for those meetings...

Maybe is the fact of going away...

Maybe is the fact that for the first time I will work in conditions that I believe should be less rare to find.

Maybe is the fact os circulating alone, of feeling lonely: the fact of not feeling like talking, the fact that I repeat myself so much, the fact that I DO miss my summer, and back in time things were so complicated but so much was done.

The fact that satisfaction became something far. What is this really, way shall I mention or consider even...

The fact of missing strangely Stolzenhagen a place were I haven't to be anything, I could just mingle into the furniture, feel calm, feel time, feel love and maybe have Steph Maher moving me around, receive new triggers from Peter, be inspired by Keith and observe and hug people, chop vegetables, clean dishes late in the night listening to songs, or listening to silence...
To be alone and don't feel lonely,
To don't speak, or to speak with plants.
Being busy with the noise of all that bodies and all that wishes.
Try stuff, dive into people stuff... Dig my own shit.

I guess I start to miss the beauty of that simplicity, the magic.
Here I go deal with taxes, money, rehearsals schedules and all this matter that makes the imaginary poor. But is part of it.

I have people taking care of me.... Everybody should have people taking care of. Soon I will just need to dance. Is lovely...
is lovely...
There is this strange wave, Im happy, but confuse.

the time just move forward...

2011-11-30T17:32:00.001+01:00

2011-11-30T14:56:00.001+01:00

keith :)

hy stranger

2011-11-30T01:09:00.001+01:00

I just saw Keith and Jessem perform.... Saw lots of people that I deeply like this night...
I felt out of track... suddenly all my fragility open up again, I need to dance.
I cant manage inwards in words...

bun ny

2011-11-25T00:39:00.001+01:00

me and my bunny soon on stage together :)
visit the queer rabbit blog for more!

for you from me

2011-11-09T16:08:00.000+01:00

I am sure you know
I will be always here,

at least to try
vehemently catch
you if you fall.

Go ahead
Just go
Im here

you make
me believe
on ways to
build wonder

I am thankful for that
so back, only love is what
I can offer: only trust is what
I can give.

I support all
your dreams.

Dreams are big part of what hope
is made of.

I owe
you
my
hope

and

you
hold
some
of my
dreams

you have me
for all
forever

my wonder - the supple world

2011-11-08T21:02:00.000+01:00

Follow the white rabbit,

is the best way to keep the dream and the imagination alive.

I go around alone, I give chance to opportunities, to surprises, and to all the little bunnies.

I just start to surrender back to the part of me that most love, to the kid that vibrates inside.

Im back to my tales senses. what anyway would be my reality if not something evolved in fantasy.

All this pieces of my reality are build by the invisible.

All that I know by feeling assume higher hierarchy.

Some of this tactful experiences do not regard to any logic,

they mean by itself. they exist, they allowed me to be.

in order to humanize my being certain levels of subtlety are required, the core of any message is in the delicacy of what its hide.

speck became as important as see... for this I prefer the transparency of any material, is valuable the world we bring inside, the big fishes of deep water. The rabbits holes. All that does not exist is beautiful.

I will never be as young as I am tonight...

How soon is now?

2011-10-28T09:01:00.002+02:00

I am the son 
And the heir 
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar 
I am the son and heir
 Of nothing in particular

You shut your mouth
 How can you say
 I go about things the wrong way ?
 I am human and i need to be loved
 Just like everybody else does

There's a club, if you'd like to go 
You could meet somebody who really loves you
 So you go, and you stand on your own 
And you leave on your own
 And you go home, and you cry
 And you want to die

When you say it's gonna happen "now"
 Well, when exactly do you mean ?
 See, i've already waited too long
 And all my hope is gone

(the smiths)

good stuff

2011-10-27T00:30:00.001+02:00

Trajal Harrell (US) / Cecilia Bengolea (AR) / François Chaignaud (FR) / Marlene Freitas (PT)

Neurology is so hilarious!

2011-10-20T14:00:00.002+02:00

Launching my new solo

When you picked up that hot plate the other day and burned the skin of your fingers, you had pain and might even have suffered from having it. Here is what happened to you, in the simplest neurobiolog-ical terms:

First, the heat activated a large number of thin and unmyelinated nerve fibers, known as C-fibers, available near the burn. (These fibers,which are distributed literally everywhere in the body, are evolutionarily old and are largely dedicated to carrying signals about internal body states, including those that will end up causing pain. They are called unmyelinated because they lack the insulating sheath known as myelin. Lightly myelinated fibers known as A-Ô fibers travel along with C-fibers and perform a similar role. Together they are called nociceptive because they respond to stimuli that are potentially or actually damaging o living tissues.)

Second, the heat destroyed several thousand skin cells, and the destruction released a number of chemical substances in the area.

Third, several classes of white blood cell concerned with repairing tissue damage were called to the area, the call having come from some of the released chemicals (e.g., a peptide known as substance P and ions such as potassium).

Fourth, several of those chemicals activated nerve fibers on their own, joining their signaling voices to that of the heat itself. Once the activation wave was started in the nerve fibers, it traveled to the spinal cord and a chain of signals was produced across several neurons (a neuron is a nerve cell) and several synapses (a synapse is the point where two neurons connect and transmit signals) along the appropriate pathways. The signals went all the way into the top levels of the nervous system: the brain stem, the thalamus, and even the cerebral cortex.

What happened as a result of the succession of signals? Ensembles of neurons located at several levels of the nervous system were temporarily activated and the activation produced a neural pattern, a sort of map of the signals related to the injury in your fingers. The central nervous system was now in possession of multiple and varied neural patterns of tissue damage selected according to the biological specifications of your nervous system and of the body proper with which it connects. The conditions needed to generate a sensation of pain had been met.

(DAMASIO, The feeling of what happens: Body and emotions on the making of consciousness. )

2011-10-09T09:39:00.001+02:00

Or the waterfall, or music heard so deeply That it is not heard at all, but you are the

music While the music lasts. These are only hints and guesses, Hints followed by

guesses; and the rest Is prayer, observance, discipline, thought and action. The hint

half guessed, the gift half understood, is Incarnation.

T. S. ELIOT "Dry Salvages" from Four Quartets

The question of who I was consumed me.

I became convinced I should not find the image

of the person that I was: Seconds passed. What rose to the surface in me plunged out

of sight again. And yet I felt the moment of my first investiture was the moment I

began to represent myself— the moment I began to live—by degrees—second by

second—unrelentingly—Oh mind what you're doing!—

do you want to be covered or do you want to be seen?.—

And the garment — how it becomes you!—starry

with the eyes of

others,

weeping —

JORIE GRAHAM "Notes on the Reality of the Self" from Materialism

For the new work - MOM, THE KIDS WERE KILL.

2011-10-06T00:36:00.000+02:00

BROKEN THINGS
CROOKED HOPE
THE HERO FAILD
NIGHTS ARE LONG
BROKEN DREAMS
HARSH WORLDS
THERE IS NO SCAPE
STILL ALONE
MOLDY BEINGS
INVENTED WORDS
THE SOUL EMPTY
DESIRES BURNT
DUSTY PROMISSES
THAT WILL NEVER BE
PARADISE IS MEMORY
ROTTING IN SHIT
NOTHINGNESS

ALWAYS GO ON

ARE FUCKING DONE

TELL IT TO MOM

BROKEN WINGS
REWIND THE LOANS
SILENT SCREAMS
THE KIDS ARE GONE

I will probably do something at Luna Park, Berlin.

2011-09-29T00:48:00.002+02:00

The thing is...
Nothing that Im passing through is special or unique mine, I guess mostly of my ex-class mates share this. Im trying to make it feel special, for myself...
Im becoming boring with this....
Is a metter of getting attention in the end...
who never felt bad before?
Than I need to prove myself I have value. So i try to convince myself though speaking and telling and bull-shiing, Im just creating some more illusions.
bla bla bla caralho a quatro, nem eu me agüento mais.
ok, I go read a book.

2011-09-27T19:33:00.001+02:00

I don't know what to do, Where to run....

I t doesn't really netter, I don't feel any better...

There is a promise on time, but this promise will keep not being, will keep a promise will keep without realize. It doesn't matter what I want, even if I have it seems this feeling that I bring on me will never leave . What is this? From where it comes? The sensation is that nothing that I could get would make it any better, no promise, no time, no person no dream. I am meeting the dankest of my being… I have no idea if I can feel light any longer...

There is a necessity inside, banging the walls of my torso...

I fell useless... sarcastic and strange.

this flu that now is living on my is jut the result of all those screams... all the screams closed in years...

Sometimes I feel that I will have a hart attack, I just want to end in tears... but even the tears are not breve enough to appear.

Dosing netter to who to write, where to go, or how much scream... it seems that the crap is mine, is I.

Holy body that feels so much… holy crap creature I become...

there is something strongly percolating…

I am useless for poet or writer, useless to create, useless even to myself...

i feel like finishing.

read it

2011-09-23T09:53:00.002+02:00

2011-09-18T20:57:00.002+02:00

I have something kicking inside...
today is one of the days I want to give up.

2011-09-17T20:31:00.005+02:00

YOU CAN´T BURN OUT IF YOU ARE NOT ON FIRE

face the reality of your mind, thats fucking you, just you.

dive deep, dive deep.

where the big fishes are.

even the non real, is part of you, the choice.

2011-09-16T08:52:00.000+02:00

I´m not r e a l i t y

strange feeling

2011-09-15T21:44:00.000+02:00

I started to see old photos
my sternum shivered
I start to feel strange
my breath changed
I start to miss my old life
things went way too fast
I miss 8 years
14 - 22
so much happened...
so much still happens
so much still change
so much I still miss
my sternum still feels strange.

2011-09-06T08:37:00.001+02:00

I have nothing else then memories
Im just a lonely guy walking with a bag-pack
and there is nothing bad about it
a boy that the time insist to make grow up

all that I have is gone in the instant that I have
they turn invisible again
just memories

collections of things that give up from me
or I give up from them
all this calculations
all the mesuraments
all the worlds
all the words

Im just finishing
Im a being made of bits of ends.

in haven everything is fine

2011-09-04T13:10:00.001+02:00

strange.

what.

love.

does.

confidential.

invented.

reality.

compulsive.

dare.

cry.

moanings.

motion.

swear.

when.

alone.

sunset.

ghosts.

performed.

for.

ghosts.

space.

invisible.

takes.

over.

nothing.

dragged.

drifted.

became.

me.

them.

my.

self.

own.

drug.

shivering.

beast.

over.

ashes.

traces.

memories.

those.

evil.

ghost.

love.

garden

2011-08-24T15:51:00.003+02:00

-coexist

-be available to dream

-fight with poetry

-fall in love for people, many people at the same time

-give a try before it gets late

-let gentleness teach the air

-take lessons of freedom from a bird

-let the wind measure the volume of the space

-I heard that when the trees dance they make the wind blow

-notice that:

-as big as the infinite is the invisible

-things have depth

-persons have depth

-instants bring the sensation of eternity

-things don't belong

-love is not an obligation

-reciprocity is loon

-space wight

-value derivated on agreement and concepts

-we wish persons were endless

-fear is allowed

-loneliness exist

-you make things important and special

-things change

-things go

-responsibility helps relationship

-heart don't think

-in the end all leads to ignorances

I want to improve my nothings and ignorances

they make me love beyond than what is acceptable

sun

2011-08-24T10:32:00.002+02:00

If I have no one to talk i write

if i do not want to do anything

i read all that i wrote again

i disagree

i think i dialog with myself

but all this should be said to someone

i am not good in saying

i am good at hugging

touch and being touched

on my physical and on my being

this is a time were the body rests

the mind and emotions work

the body unlearn

the mind creates prisons where my stereotypes leave

i want to let it free

i don't want to belong

all restricted form has no dream

style becomes a expression of stigma

i repeat things that i find on my mind

I miss you

you don't mind

I miss lots of people that don't mind

i don't really mind they don't mind me

i just able to miss and love without reciprocity

you cannot force someone love or miss you.

i want to let it free

if i belong to a state

is the state of dream

i don't want to belong

than i unlearn

with my body too

and i think this is a dialog to myself

but all this i should say to someone

someone can not mind

and i will not mind it doesn't mind

i repeat things that i find on my mind.

is hot this that recognize as sun

its exploding always

like it dialogs with itself, even though its a star

it is alone

and is the only one i can see.

i like to see star on the day

i will never see stars, just star

I start to stop

pillow

2011-08-24T08:54:00.002+02:00

i think i need much less

The need is endless

i cannot less feel
i need less sense

i misfeel a lot

To much emptied me

Empty need to fill

Need needs to quiet

Fill can be of nothing

i am constant undying to feel

my jaw is tense
i am on my own

hope breaks own heart less more time

bed

2011-08-24T00:07:00.017+02:00

Nowadays before sleep the undone and uneven invade me,
It gives me special talent for emotional slavery,
It suggests me that all the names impoverished the images.
I start to like the crooked verbs and invented words.
It makes me believe that everything that doesn't exist is beautiful.
I dig at the unlimit of my being,
I don't care about the denounce of words. what has metering is their wild part, their allowances.
I am making myself of nothingness: memories, imagination and desires.
I always had use for nothing.
So is than that I began to dream, and leave through misunderstanding. I like things that undo.
I unhave a lot.
I am constantly unlearning.

gentle

2011-08-19T23:32:00.006+02:00

Manuel de Barros...
Make me full.

Love too.

_____

Eu sei das iluminações do ovo .

Não tremulam por mim os estandartes.

Não organizo rutilâncias

Nem venho de nobrementes .

Maior que o infinito é o incolor.

Eu sou meu estandarte pessoal.

Preciso do desperdício das palavras para conter-me.

O meu vazio é cheio de inerências.

Sou muito comum com pedras.

..........................................

(O que está longe de mim é preclaro ou escuro?)

Manoel de Barros
O livro das Ignorancas

____

(...)Achava que a partir

de ser inseto o homem poderia entender melhor a metafísica.

Eu precisava de ficar pregado nas coisas vegetalmente e achar

o que não procurava. Naqueles relentos de pedra e lagartos,

gostava de conversar com idiotas de estrada e maluquinhos de

mosca. Caminhei sobre grotas e lajes de urubus. Vi outonos

mantidos por cigarras. Vi lamas fascinando borboletas. E

aquelas permanências nos relentos faziam-me alcançar os

deslimites do Ser. Meu verbo adquiriu espessura de gosma.

Fui adotado em lodo . Já se viam vestígios de mim nos lagartos.

Todas as minhas palavras já estavam consagradas de pedras.

Dobravam-se lírios para os meus tropos. Penso que essa

viagem me socorreu a pássaros. Não era mais a denúncia das

palavras que me importava mas a parte selvagem delas, os

seus refolhos, as suas entraduras. Foi então que comecei a

lecionar andorinhas.

Manoel de Barros

O livro das Ignorancas

Please read this

2011-08-14T13:58:00.000+02:00

The worthiest €9,00

brain (re)boot

2011-08-13T21:37:00.005+02:00

photo Rachel Garis

What are the conditions that one needs to research and approach different places, and states in its physicality? What are the triggers? How to let the other exist?

Thinking on this always morphing guides, I developed small utopias or fictions fragments where I can explore my renege of freedom and get inspiration to keep on evolving my dance and my love. Looking for an approach towards an inventive body I found myself observing and doing choreography, this late experiments I have been called Dechoreography. A term that instigates me by it impossibility, giving me a lot to work from.

So what is the concept of Dechoreography?

Well, still asking myself, but what I already discovered is that is nothing more than a utopia , a try out of deconstruct and/or be irresponsible. Im taking the chance of reduce choice making as much as I can and work in collaborations, even alone. Is researching in choreography that a platform is created to generate problems and questions to explore and embody. Is a big game between the hierarchy of choreographer and performer, maker and doer.

Trying, paradoxically, to assume more responsibility as performer than as choreographer. Using improvisation and instant composition as "less declared" forms of choreography and playing with my own power, choice making and renege of freedom.

By working with/for different choreographers I accumulate different view points or approaches to creation, and this is nursing my process.

In "Dechoreography 1 - References/Recycling/Refresh" the physical build up of the piece happened on the spot, on stage, was never rehears as a whole, from beginning to end. The experiment put together notes, references and experiences from the past three years were the energy channeling was choose as well as the time and states proposals. Was a play with patterns that doesn't belong to my body just, but relying on different material.

The stage meeting with Zinzi, also could be include as one of the experiments of dechoreography, as a negotiation experience on a score that suggest just a meeting, where we should take by surprise and let the motion evolves and transform through the relationship and the agreements created and understand by us on stage, coming by observing one the other. And our social relation, our micro economy.

The next experiments challenge a live created score, for a duo, and a new solo were I research renege of freedom, on scores that I have been collecting through this last months, where I ask people to choose whatever song, press play and write a score while the song is playing, once the song is finish they give me the score and the soundtrack. Inside of this "automatic writing scores" I place myself to embody this ideas and conceder how much of choice Still can make.

its possible to read more about on the previous texts. But as much I will be able to articulate more I would write about, and try to make the idea grow and while I am trying to make myself busy or important with this thoughts, I read the text of Keith in relation to his studies of Turbulence.
By the way I just bought the book of Naomi Klein, The shock Doctrine and is scary, specially because she is not talking about unknown things…. we are so blind or unaware… or ludic?, even if I don't understand 100% what she is talking because of my shit english I just feel so ashamed of being at home, in front of my computer trying to make myself important, and being an emotional slave. Is true there is so much absurd, and it seems that we kindly agree with it.

This week I had many moments of feeling powerless towards people that I just smile and try to run away, while in my mind I wanted to scream FUCK YOU FUCKER, imagining one of Tarantino´s scenes where I would put the men on fire after pee and shit on him. What we do in relation to power. How I contribute for this corruption exist? What kind of bitch am I ?

What I do in my power relations. What can I do if I still depend much more of other people, if all the time things should be concern, if I have a fucking visa issue, or if the hight of my legs would impress someone that could PLEASE help me without try to fuck me. To whom Im laying? to myself, to realize Im part of an image society, where I should react and be like this or like that in relation to situation… I have a lot of fuck off to say… and they never come up… WAY? dechoreography is a FUCK OFF for choreographers or people that are to busy with authorship because they have to OWN something, they need to have some value, they need to feel important.. and I totally include myself in this fuck off.

so I try to dechoreography myself, creating make-ups to don't really face things, or to trigger my imagination by soften terms that make me uncomfortable.

I am a performer, a dancer, a mover, a passionate and I hate to have my work diminished in comparison to a choreographer. Way they pretend to be more important, if I need to have my balls together and charge myself and my being. if I am the one that need to agree and allowed. I don't want to be hidden behind a choreographer, I like to assume my responsibility even if it look like shit.

I should just go out and scream, or burn some stuff… it will not help in nothing… my hysteria… maybe just helps my hedonism and my satisfaction, that are totally part of a neo-liberal behavior. I don't have place to run. I don't have an address, i don't have anything than my body. And the eager for some autonomy. I didn't took the microphone. because I always give up of myself, thinking that I not smart enough to shout, but in general people bull shit all the time, I made fucking for years of learning how to bull shit, I was selling unnecessary thing for unnecessary people. For some reason I don't believe anymore on much of the things I hear. I should just keep on bullshiting. Im tired of no generosity, Give me a generous slap at least.

I believe in what I fell, when I touch, when I recognize things that eyes cannot deny.

I can understand things… but I still fucked!

Does this text make senesce? No clue.

I assume the shoot on the feet.

I need to fucking dance.

Me and my fucking doubts, me and my fucking low esteem, me and my horny body.

turbulence-a dance about the economy from Saliq Francis Savage on Vimeo.

Dechoreography 1

2011-08-08T01:52:00.001+02:00

This solo was made in 5 days, on a very hard period of transition and adaptation, at P.O.R.C.H. - Ponderosa. Was performed one week before the duet on my last post, as you can see there is extremely difference on the energy channeling, and my crazy eyes, I do agree I should had soften them each time a see the video. "Dechoreography 1 - References/Recycling/Refresh." is a yell that born from this turbulent period. Driving me to places I had never been (or exposed) and wanted to be. Unfortunately Because of a camera error I miss a little transition between the first and second part of the solo, was important because it start to happened already when I sit down with the red shirt, was the try out to become something more feminine... Below you can find some notes that were happened to me on those days, Even though they were very randomic is important for me to register it here.

____

Choreography is a negotiation with the patterns your body is thinking.

There is something to dechoreograph here.

I want to negotiate with petterns other bodyes are thinking - utopia-

Someone already did the choice… it was not me… maybe my choice is hear the others choice, or the possibilities is given to me towards choice.

The audience makes the container.

____

STAY CLOSE TO THE SOURCE

How we make a field of choices a friend and not a overwhelming bounder? How we comeback also sometimes to a position of passionate ignorance, enough to choose something, instead to knowing everything?

____

Dechoreography 1 - References/Recycling/Refresh.

The use of different bodies on the own body. How many people could I bring on the skin?

Far away collaborations without ask for allowance, observations, notes and questions nourish the content and the body of this performance. References, recycling paths as well as a sense of non authorship were part of the start point, together with the curiosity on the other and it resonance. Was dechoreographing oneself that this experience was done as a multiple layer of a time and lifestyle exposure.

Those are not just my ideas.

You have seen all this before.

What one is if not a clump of references?

Thanks to: Peter Pleyer, Stephanie Mayer, P.O.R.C.H. II group 2011, Jerome Bel, Cena 11, Zoltan Vakulya, Stephanie Van Aken, Yuriko Suzuki, Douglas Jung and Martin Kilvadi.

____

The need of making NEW, or create something nobody haven't seen always appear as a need for whoever deals with creation. The try to be unic and special. Knowledge is build through out references and different experiences. All this links and diagramans build oneself. Was never possible to don't refer to something or someone, is a constant exchange of information and transformation of it.

Is a bunch of things that found the explanation to exist, is a bunch of things I Loved try to do. Who is the author of it? A collective...

Something about originality and the way we concern it.

How creation happened?

How knowledge Happened?
My range of freedom...

Life rushing...

2011-08-06T11:08:00.000+02:00

Plenty of things are happening,all this month without internet generate a lot of good stuff for the inside that I couldnt process yet, life is rushing.
Among all the things were happened this is one of the latest things I perform (before Keith), was a beautiful Impro meeting with Zinzi, at Ponderosa performance maratone. We surprise each other with the costumes and Peter Pleyer surprise us with the music.
There is a lot to tell...

The empty 96

2011-07-10T02:17:00.000+02:00

Has been already some time that he was confronting himself with plural and paradoxical emotions, the rhythm was inconstant but intense, but until them has never faced, or acknowledge what later "unconditionally" would be the word to make company for such a verb.

And it felt right. And it felt true.

The image was simple, and even would look banal if was not saturated of memories. Was a blue empty locker, and a strange clear corner that made him cry.

For a while was stareing the number 96 trying to understand the tears that strangely were being mixed with a smile. So he breath strongly with chilly and sweaty skin, realizing that there were no way back, put on his bag-pack and went up the stairs to find the exit door. Had impression that never would come back to those walls, also because that walls with clear corner and empty 96 were no longer the same.

And he missed.

The sun hit his face, with close eyes towards the sky felt the salty taste of his own present. Was pleasant, was confuse, was empty but was full. Just realize that was able to love on unconditional level. Love with no worry, Love with no pretension, Love with no sorrow or fear, Love that was endless, going beyond his rationality - in this moment believed was even beyond his own life.

And was genuine.

He was trying to articulate this moment, felt that was walking alone, but not lonely, Felt the changes. that were new beginnings. Felt it hard, but not impossible. Felt freedom, but within calm. Felt that was moving forward, in the best direction. Felt mature, and really human. Felt the time profusion and the bless of the instant. Felt lucky. Felt happy. Felt right. Felt soft. Felt thankful. Felt ready.

2011-07-07T03:23:00.000+02:00

sadness can be very physical

2011-07-05T11:46:00.001+02:00

Learning how to leave and let it die... Is a day full of sorrow

DEEP LOVE PART- reflexion over the last...

2011-07-04T23:33:00.000+02:00

Keep On Using Me

Is a process of three year, the process of a friendship.

The process of be able to trust, respect, admire, share , love, talk, live, allow, compromise, change, learn, listening, agree, touch, goth, nourish, grow, read, chase, rescue, support, inspire, play, contradict, understand, dig, deepening and expose from what one is made.

The possibility of be true, real and naked towards someone eyes. And look trough each others soul.

Share all this intimate kaleidoscope of singular sensations that are build on the instant between a genuine relation; between the togetherness.

To know that one is not alone on this diagram bring a richness to the spirit and open the doors to the other, the other who watch or who dance.

Was multilayering all the stories, experiences, ideas and references that "Keep on Using Me" born. on its physicality, essence and generosity; the first agreement was the desire to work together and be together. By trust on the body, the trust on the feelings grew and generate a playground of power were the only winner is the friendship and its strength, because the best place is where its placed, and the best time is this shared instant.

Yes it is about you

2011-07-03T08:33:00.000+02:00

I don't mind anymore where you live, where is your mind or what you feel, I even not trying to understand what consideration means to you. I despise you by the fact you made me loose time getting sad, considering, being worry and sorry, crying around, giving my space to you feel better and trying to support you.... Because is hard.... For US.

You invade me, you fuck me up with your theater, now I don't want to understand, you put me on a place I don't want to be, you influence my dance, the most precious thing I have; you were messing it up with your "suffer". I was letting this poison me. Because I thought would be ok, it would worth, and that one day we could really become good friends. I thought I like you.... I thought I respect you, I thought I was cruel.

I was wrong.

I feel stupid about that, I feel used.

...

And yes I do think you are a motherfucker egoist.

Before I could give away my chances... not anymore.

I understand we have different ways to deal with things, and Im thankful for this, I was comprehensible.

Now I take all back.

I take back all my patience,

I take back all my respect, I take back all the times I said I love you.

Today you introduce me to hate, as I never felt before.

I hate you.

And will give myself time to hate you.

And I deeply desire you disappear, because you make me sick. And Im revolt and disgust.

I HOPE YOU FIND YOUR WAY FAR AWAY FROM MINE.

more memories...

2011-06-10T20:10:00.001+02:00

2011

and we danced... 2010

That was a bigggg joy! "Would you buy us?"2009

all the colors are changing

2011-06-10T08:21:00.000+02:00

2011
_______________

in the beginning ...

Time to change.... Soon SEAD is over and day by day, Im finding some memories from the 3 year here. Im becoming nostalgic and emotional... what is a bit funny.
Well, is time for a new beginning.

2011-05-28T10:54:00.000+02:00

from my brother imaginary

Past Present Future - for SEAD booklet... hahahahaha

2011-05-10T23:11:00.000+02:00

Past:

Once upon a time there was a turning point, maybe right after a fall from the shelf, draws in green on my fathers old white car, spreading oil on the kitchen floor like a product to clean it helping mummy; even after learn how to climb in walls, trees and hide on the roof behind the chiminea for not attending school; surely then the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus and Bogeyman were already dead on the fantasy and no longer believed in all things that was watching and/or trying to read on the news. It was a hard task to put first letters and than words together.

By the way learn to read was quite something, making new discovery and also realize that authors are normal humans that write concerning their experiences. Noticed that the experience, and not the truth, is what gives meaning to scripture.

Would say, with my friend Foucault, that we write to transform what we know and not to convey the already known. If anything encourages us to write is the possibility that this act of writing, this experience into words, let us free from certain truths in order to stop being what we were to be anything different than we have been.

Present:

Traiing I Would say, that I dance to transform what I know and not to convey the already known. If anything encourages me to dance is the possibility that this act of dancing, this experience into sensual knowledge, let me free from certain truths in order to stop being what I am to be anything different than I have been.

Furthermore, the experience, and not truth, is what gives meaning to education. Educate them to transform what we know, not to convey in the already known. If anything it encourages me to dance is the possibility to produce knowledge, experience in gesture, letting free from certain truths in order to stop being what we are, to be anything different we have been specially in our way of questioning and sharing.

Future:

"Will upon a time" a turning point, maybe right after a fall on the ice, draws with white tape on the linoleum, spreading bananas stickers on SEAD; even after learn how to go to the floor, do handstand and have savasana as the favorite yoga pose; surely then will be days I will be dead and the fantasy would help to believe that will be a way to work in Europe. It is a hard task to put dreams and perspectives in a reality.

By the way learn to be patient, making new discovery and also realize that choreographers are normal humans that choose concerning their experiences and procuctions. Notice that the experience, and not the truth, is what gives meaning to creation.

After will say, to my friends Thomas Hauert, Yasmeen Godder, Julyen Hamilton, Mag Stuart, Ann Liv Young, Alain Platel, Christian Rizzo and Anne Teresa de Keersmaeker that was a pleasure to work with them, but I would comeback to Brazil to open a bookshop with my brother, and spend my days telling, reading and repeating stories.

Everybodystoolbox.net

2011-05-08T09:54:00.000+02:00

Chrysa Parkinson

What are you working on?

I’m trying to understand practices, particularly the practices of performing artists. I’m working in Montpellier at 6M1L/E.x.erce. And I’m touring, with Zoo/Thomas Hauert and occasionally with Deborah Hay. And I’m teaching. When I’m not performing, I do a daily performance practice based on a combination of scores from Deborah and Zoo and other people. It has about six sections. Sometimes I help people devise daily performance practices (aka Personal Performance Practice, or PPP). Sometimes I just talk to people about how they hierarchize information and sustain themselves creatively. Sometimes I take part of someone’s practice and add it to my own.

That sounds like a lot of things.

It’s all the same thing kind of. It just happens in a lot of different places.

Can you define what you mean by practice more clearly?

I’m trying to do that. I’m not satisfied yet. I started with the idea that there’s something I do that is not training, process, or product, and that this thing is what underlies the decisions I make about training, process and product. And I wanted to call that thing my practice – but I didn’t have a way of saying that in one phrase – a slogan. Then I thought maybe I could say the underlying, over-arching thing I do is “giving and getting attention.” Then more recently I thought maybe my practice is just performance.

Why do you need the slogan?

I don’t really. But it’s useful for demystification.

Seems like you would have to be careful that the wording doesn’t hijack the concept.

Yes. That’s the whole point, actually. I want to identify this concept of practice more precisely because I can feel that not only are my training, process and product changing, but also my way of choosing them is changing. In order to be clear and responsible, conscious, generous, effective, etcetera, I need to take a look at how I’m making decisions, and why.

So a practice is like a structure.

A volatile one. The most important thing to me about identifying my practice is noticing it change, letting it change.

Does this interest come up because of teaching people?

Yes. I notice my students devising principles, or thought-maps, mythologies, wish-lists, moral codes… some substructure that helps them navigate or synthesize or do some other thing that I don’t know exactly what it is; that thing helps them get through and around and up on their work. A lot of students start from a very vulnerable, vague point. Then they go make lives based on making art. It’s remarkable.

But isn’t that just that they get training and then become good enough at what they want to do to actually do it?

No. They often redefine being “good at it” by redefining “it.” That’s the excitement. They use their education to change the field they work in.

Not everyone.

No. But even the ones who fit into an existing set of standards arrive at that level of achievement through something more than just training. Taking class every day isn’t enough. You have to have a way of processing information that works. And I see it in the other, older artists I work with too.

But is that the actual definition of practice? The “thing you do that isn’t training, process or product but underlies your choices in training, process and product”?

I used that definition to start with because I could feel it in myself, and I observed it at work in other people.

I know Deborah uses the concept of practice, but who else does?

Actually I hear it used a lot lately.

Me too, but I think people mean different things by it.

Yes. It gets soupy.

What do people mean, actually? I’m getting more confused now than I was before people used the word so much.

I think I hear performing artists and educators use the word three ways, basically. There’s practice as “an active thought”. Meaning that if my practice is music, I apply the concepts and experience of musicality to analyze and intuit all my experiences. And if my practice is performance, I use the concepts and experience of performance to analyze and intuit my experiences.

So that would mean if I’m studying dance but my practice is music, I use the concepts and experience of music to analyze and intuit the dance information I’m exposed to?

Yes. And you see a lot of people approaching dance through a musical practice. In fact, dance can often be found humping the leg of other art forms.

Why are you so derogatory about that?

It’s another topic, but it’s one of the basic problems in thinking about dance. In order for dance to be taken seriously, it’s often used to create metaphors for psychology, theory, music, visual art, etc.

You would exclude other art forms?

No. I’d just like to do more dancing. More things based on movement.

Movement is a poetic concept as well as an actual thing.

Let’s talk about this later. Actually you should really talk to Tere O’Connor about this. He’s very articulate on the subject, which is rare. It’s hard to talk about it.

Okay. So what’s another way you hear people using the word practice?

The other thing people mean by the word practice is “ an habitual or regular activity”. If I’m a practicing musician, I play an instrument regularly. If I’m a practicing performer, I perform often. It often means that the person is a professional in that field, but not necessarily.

And in that case if I’m a musician and studying dance, I could use this definition “habitual or regular activity” and say that I am practicing dance?

If you were a snake charmer and you regularly work as a dentist, you could say you were practicing dentistry.

That’s confusing.

There’s more. Americans spell the noun and the verb the same way, “a practice” and “to practice.” In the British spelling, the verb develops an s. I have a dentistry practice. I’m going to my office to practise dentistry. I have a dance practice. I’m practising dance.

That’s irrelevant.

Not really. They mean different things, and they’re spelled differently. Actually I think I’ll switch to the British spelling now. The third way I hear it used – to “try” – means if I go to the studio to practise my music, I go play my instrument repetitively, or rehearse. If I go to the studio and practise a dance, I rehearse. If I’m a student practising dances, it means I keep doing movements until I get them right.

You can’t practice British spelling.

No, you have to practise British spelling.

But you can have a British spelling practice.

Exactly.

Thanks, that clears things up.

You’re welcome.

The first definition you used for practice, “an active thought” sounds like the definition of praxis “the process by which a theory, lesson or skill is enacted.” Is practice and praxis the same thing?

Maybe. A practice is an active thought, while praxis is an action that enables that thought. I wish the words sounded more different. It’s confusing and that there are so many words that start with P. Makes me feel ridiculous.

That’s ridiculous. Stop talking about that. Do you want to not use the word “praxis?”

It exists and I hear it around. Maybe it’s useful.

It does seem like a pretty tangible difference -- “an active thought,” or “an action that enables thought.” Seems concrete enough to be relevant.

The problem is, I think, that so many thoughts and actions I’m interested in can’t be identified as one or the other.

What do you mean? Is that some Buddhist thing?

You know I’m not a Buddhist. If there’s a relationship it’s accidental.

But you meditate.

That’s personal.

But it’s a practice.

Okay. But I really would prefer to keep that out of this discussion because I’m not sure how to talk about it. I can feel the concrete effects of meditation on how I concentrate, and on the detailing of my sensations, but I think there are spiritual connotations to doing it that I have not dealt with at all and don’t know how to deal with, and I don’t want to deal with it with you. So I feel unqualified to speak about it right now.

All right, all right. Relax. I’m sorry I brought it up. So. What do you mean by a thought-action? And what does it have to do with praxis/practice?

So. I often experience both actions and ideas as scores; a movement or performance idea, like an action, can take an amount of time, or can occupy a place. But ideas are also processes. Actions are definitely processes. Scores are durational places. You spend time in a score.

How can idea be a place?

Any idea I can “get in to” is a place. Any idea I can embody.

Can you give an example?

Okay. With apologies to the people that I’m paraphrasing, plagiarizing, misrepresenting…. For example, David Zambrano’s idea/score/practice/action of “passing through” creates an area of experience that is clearly enough defined to distinguish it as a place. I can drop in there. Sometimes I use the idea of “fiction”. If I superimpose the idea of fiction on my actions, they are contained and limited by that definition – I can’t get out of the idea until I drop it. Or Deborah Hay’s questions that start with “what if every cell in my body could...”. Or the way Thomas Hauert conceptualizes the relationships between force and space and bodies (I can’t find a simpler way to say that yet…). Working with him I can feel the pressure and release, the momentum and force and launching effects of his experience of connection. His way of connecting manifests itself both physically and intellectually. It’s not an absolute Truth; it’s a perception that finds ways to act itself out.

And Martin Kilvady’s concept of “dancing” as a field of experience?

Exactly. If you say what you’re doing is dancing, then you change the definition of dancing. The idea becomes a container that shapes whatever action takes place there, and the actions that take place there also re-shape the container. Jonathan Burrows has a sense of proportion – I’ve heard him call it “human scale” that runs through all his work. The idea acts on him. He acts on the idea. It’s integrating, but there are things I think he wouldn’t do because of this practice/idea/score/action of finding a human scale.

Maybe the concepts of praxis and practice are continuous, like a mobius strip. “My practice is contained by a praxis but the praxis is also defined by my practice?”

Yes. I’m not sure what the good of distinguishing these words is. The more I think about it the more dangerous it seems to me.

Why?

Practice becomes static if you separate it from Praxis, and vice versa.

What’s wrong with that?

Once a practice is static it’s no longer functional. It becomes a marketable object, a product. Practices have to remain volatile, unstable enough to change.

I don’t understand how volatility makes something unmarketable. And I don’t understand what’s wrong with marketability.

I’m a performing artist. I change – I get old, I fall in love, I move to another city, I get injured, I develop skills, I develop knowledge, I lose interest, I get seduced, etc. In order to guide me through training, process and product, my practice has to change.

If you can conceive of a product with no author or owner, you could think of a practice as a chemical reaction that would act as a catalyst on your experience.

Yes. And then why would you bother buying it. It’s not going to keep the value or shape it has in someone else’s experience. And anyway it’s just there. Just take it.

But David sells Passing Through, doesn’t he?

No. I don’t think that’s what he’s doing. He teaches ways of moving, techniques that he’s discovered for passing through. It’s a way to start. He’s not selling the practice of passing through, and certainly not the practice in the way that he uses it for himself. He lives that. He invites people to join him in that way of living. He’s often providing people with space or time. They spend it with him and they learn from him, but he’s not bartering.

Is there really a difference?

Yes. Klein Technique tried to become a product at one point. A select group of people went into an intensive studying relationship with the authors of that technique, but when it came down to it, every one of that group of people declined their diploma. They felt that the elitism of qualification, and the labeling of the product as intellectual property, was detrimental to the practice. I think it’s a testament to the ideas behind that practice that it’s practitioners refused to make a product out of it.

I remember that. It was shocking.

Yes, and exciting. It depends on the teacher, of course, but techniques become hard-wired, systematized, standardized. You can recognize the correct application of this technique in a process. You can see how the training and process have culminated in the product and you can anticipate the market they’ll reach. It’s boring. It’s not live.

But aren’t training, process and product part of your practice?

Sometimes some of them have been. There are periods where I’m involved in processes that are not integrated into my practice, or I’m performing pieces that don’t fit into my principles, or I’m training myself for things that are no longer relevant to me. Out of habit. When I realize that’s going on I have to adapt my practice to include them, or I have to stop doing them.

For students that happens with training.

Yes. They have to study some method that is outside their experience, their principles, their expectations. For example, I’m not really that athletic. I don’t tend to push myself aerobically or muscularly. My preference is for subtler physicalities, but I perform some pieces demand a higher level of effort, and I like that intensity as a principle. I like the principle of physical range – and I like the principle of challenging my desires. So in my daily practice I’ve included a kind of jumping that uses that area of physicality that I wouldn’t go to usually.

And does that practice have to be daily?

No. It depends. Sometimes day-to-day consistency helps to heighten your experience of the physical relationships between actions and ideas. Body time is different. For things like stamina you need a daily rhythm, obviously.

What’s the difference between daily training and daily practice?

Training is about learning and improving on specific tasks. Deborah, for example, calls practice “learning without trying.” If you’re training, you’re trying to learn. You’re goal oriented, or maybe you’re putting yourself in that student-teacher relationship to find some objectivity. A practice, for the most part, is independent of teachers, and intensely subjective. It doesn’t need the presence of a viewer, although it doesn’t exclude it either. I don’t think you can specify the goals of a practice the way you can those of training.

But you’re training for stamina in your daily practice.

Not really. I could train for stamina by running much more efficiently. Stamina is a welcome by-product. I’m looking for the dancing when I jump rope.

No doubt. But some people use training as a part of their practice.

Yes. That relationship with a teacher, or even just with a goal, can function to help you keep interested in your work life. I have definitely felt that way at certain times – like I needed help to change my patterns so I could do more things. I was getting injured. Training can help with boredom. When I complain my friend Greg says, “use your training.”

And what’s the difference between process and practise?

Process also has a specific goal. If you don’t create a product from a process, it’s a failed process. It’s also a question of duration. Most processes are finished once the piece is constructed. A practice can span many processes. But I definitely use things I’ve learned in processes in my daily practice.

You said you take other people’s practices.

Yes, I realized in working on it that because my practice is performance, I have to do the thing to understand it. It’s tricky because I have to learn to listen and watch people without absorbing their experience too quickly into my own if I want to learn something new. But I can’t learn new things without doing them.

You’re just always stealing then?

No. It’s actually rare that I really like what someone else does enough to adopt it as part of my own thought process. I do relatively little of what I’ve learned.

It seems like you’ve adopted Deborah Hay’s practice.

Yes and no. I’m very influenced by her. She’s the first person I’d ever heard speak about (and use) performance itself as a practice. So when I talk about performance and practice, I use her language a lot. It’s clear. But I take a lot from Thomas/Zoo, and it’s difficult to find the right language for what we’re doing in that group. Maybe “looking at movement for what it expresses itself, not it’s metaphoric potential.” I learned that as a theory from Tere O’Connor, but as a practice from working with Thomas. It runs through everything I do now.

Are you defensive about being so influenced by Deborah?

Probably a little. Sometimes I feel like what I do is Deborah-Lite. Anyway. It’s a place to start. I try to say her name a lot so people will have her name in their heads.

What have you taken from the people in Montpellier?

I took things for my daily practice. I’m not sure how they’ll fit into the larger picture. I took jumping rope from Jefta. It works well as a form of “bounce” which is an adaptation of “moving through space without traveling from here to there,” which relates to Passing Through, but also to Zoo’s work with space, and is a direct adaptation of a Deborah Hay score. I took loops from Mette. I use them in one part of my body as part of a 3in One score I do. From Bojana I think I’m learning and maybe practicing “thinking in conversation.” I’m not sure I do that yet, actually, but I’m very attracted to it. It has to do with speech and performance and improvising and thinking and writing. I’m not sure how it will manifest eventually.

If you think of the material of performance as perception, or as relationship (as Deborah would say), then some form of “doing it” to understand it makes sense.

Yes. That’s why I like to think of the daily practices, the PPPs, as small, condensed metaphoric versions of your larger practice. They are microclimates in the larger environment of your eco-system. You can experiment safely there. I really learned that from Deborah. That’s how she makes pieces, developing them out of her daily performance practice. I do take a lot from Deborah. I feel like the “learning without trying” happened in this interview, for example.

Oh. I just thought of something. Maybe the difference that’s actually important is the difference between “a practice” and “my practice.” Once something becomes your practice, it’s infinitely more complicated than it was when it was something you could pick up from someone else. It becomes implicated in all your work, all aspects of training, process and product, and if you tried to separate it out you would kill it, or kill a part of yourself.

That’s a bit dramatic. Drowning your inner kitten. But maybe it’s that simple also.

Yes, and it’s funny because I’ve been noticing that writing is a way of making sense, which is what performance does for me.

And “thinking in conversation…”?

Not yet. I’m just attracted to it. I can’t quite do it...

More training.

Bojana calls the attention that passes between an audience and a performance “synchronizing with the duration of what you’re watching.”

Yes. I like that. Writing can synchronize. Writing can be a performance practice.

Then performance could still be your practice, even if you never performed.

Is that a goal?

No. I don’t know. Maybe. Is it for you?

I think it might be for me actually.

Oh, okay. Good luck.

Thanks.

TRAINING IS CREATING

2011-05-01T11:07:00.000+02:00

Every joint of our body has its range of movement and there are countless combinations possible to coordinate those movements. Every dance, every move is drawing it’s forms from the possibilities and restrictions of our anatomy.

The body can be seen as an extremely versatile instrument producing movement. There may be movements that are strongly connoted and others that have no significance outside of their properties as movement. Taking the anatomy, the mechanics of the body as a basis for creating movement allows an approach to choreography that is not conditioned by cultural references. The body itself becomes the guideline for the research.

From experience we know that the body can learn to do a particular movement by repeating it. It’s as if this movement is being engraved or carved into the body’s memory, deeper with each repetition and certain skills and strengths are installed. A pattern or a habit is being created and the body is likely to follow that track. This is an extremely useful even vital process but can also limit a creative use of the body.

There’s a lot to be said for the efficiency of certain conventional dance classes. Useful skills and strengths are being taught. But the routine repetition of movements and movement qualities installs patterns in the bodies that can be obstacles in contemporary choreographic processes, interfering with the artistic freedom of dancers and of choreographers.

Because most dance styles are defined by a specific set of movement patterns, shapes and qualities that reflect the aesthetic ideals of the artists who developed them, dancers have been, and are being trained in techniques that teach them to move according to pre-existing, and historic, aesthetic ideals.

Unless dance history is a specific artistic reference point in the content of a choreography those patterns are irrelevant.

The argument of injury prevention achieved by the training and “conscious” use of the body is often used to defend this form of class. No question that increasing/maintaining physical strength is necessary, the trouble is that dancers are taught to feel safe only in movements and shapes that are familiar or that they can monitor via what we call consciousness. But there are ways that prepare the body for moving safely and inventively by putting the dancer in a state of ‘dynamic awareness’ in which the body is taking care of itself whatever movement it is doing, engaging and trusting the body’s reflexes rather than simplifying the movement to what can be grasped with our analytical consciousness. The body possesses naturally a great practical knowledge about its anatomy and its mechanics, their actions and reactions, and their interactions with external forces (gravity, centrifugal- and centripetal force, another body etc.).

We are able to analyze and evaluate movement continuously on a physical level via our senses - a physical experience that engages a global awareness of the body and its situation in space and time -and to use that information directly to react and transform.

A complete picture/sense of the body rather than a list of cerebral criteria allows for far more complex movement (forms and qualities) because our attention can concentrate only on a few things at one time while our body is able to combine a great amount of information in an ever changing, fluid sense of orientation. This integrated global physical awareness can serve as a sensor for potential movement, and allows dancers and choreographers access to the creative potential of physical intuition - a creativity that comes into existence by purely physical circumstances, where no thought is necessarily formed between the moment of ‘inspiration’ and the realisation of the movement.

Our physical intelligence goes way beyond what our consciousness is able to process. Our body is able to deal with a huge variety of impulses and mechanics in movement and at the same time can give them a specific quality.

Technique is not linked to a style but is dealing with the mechanics of our anatomy, managing the movement possibilities of the body. Meaning: isolating, disconnecting or coordinating the movement of our joints (in as far as possible) and working with the internal and external forces and their interactions (balance, off balance/falls, turns, suspensions, jumps) as well as interacting with other bodies and objects (like the floor).

The body needs time to integrate the principles of a skill. Practicing basic coordination patterns is necessary for the body to understand a principle. Technique should be applicable in several circumstances and the patterns must be transposed to other movement as soon as they are understood in order to avoid creating a repertory of habits.

From this perspective it seems clear that an exercise for a specific skill can have many shapes. Rather than spending time memorizing and practicing a set sequence one can work on the skill within the frame of an improvisational task. That task in turn can be designed to challenge the dancer by leading her/him away from habits and at the same time forcing her/him to apply and practice the skill in question. While new sequences are being created and explored constantly, the dancers develop a way of thinking about creating movement that is extremely valuable in the choreographic process. This also means that the dancers’ attitude towards the work and their view on themselves as artists, and on their role in the process of creating work have to be adjusted. Dancers are no longer (and haven’t been for quite some time now) merely interpreters of given material but the experts on their instrument contributing their know-how and creativity to the process, taking a great part of responsibility for their own material and for the art work as a whole. This role is certainly not new but it doesn’t seem to have reflected enough yet on either dance training or dancers’ self-image.

This approach to technical work teaches the body to take the freedom to access the creative potential of our anatomy in interaction and allows for a different approach to movement material in choreography. It makes it possible to define parameters for moving rather than setting phrases. It enables the dancers to keep exploring a specific task on stage, making use of their technical skills while feeding the choreographic potential that lies in the complex interactions between the internal and external forces, the mechanics of our anatomy and our conscious and unconscious creative choices, accessible to our bodies in action but impossible to preconceive in detail.

Training is creating. Re-creating is not necessarily creating, nor is it always effective training. Considering the time and energy necessary for becoming a dancer and maintaining excellence, it seems essential not to repeat and install existing patterns for re-creation, but to train for creative processes that extend the art form beyond its current achievements and limits, and that acknowledge, make use of and trust our body as the wonderfully sophisticated instrument that it is.

Thomas Hauert

NIR DE VOLFF / TOTAL BRUTAL

2011-04-23T13:14:00.000+02:00

totalbrutal

ummmmhumm

2011-04-21T12:05:00.000+02:00

ANN LIV YOUNG

- Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

Ann Liv Young, "Michael" (Take On Me)

- Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

You are.... but,

2011-04-20T22:59:00.000+02:00

today I danced and discover that sadness is as stable as love...

today I wanted to be happy.

today I had a NO.

today is hard

someday...

Reflexion...

2011-04-11T08:40:00.000+02:00

Reflexion...

It was a certain time in a space full of volume, as fast its get more slow it feels. Was a group of seconds endless, there were no other thing than motion, there were no pauses.

The motion also became intensity, expectation, desires, nervosism, curiosity, love, density and disgust.

There is still thoughts to be discuss and pondered, directions to active, calmness on the ankles and wine on a bottle. Bukowiski give away his time to Caio Fernando Abreu; and Ponty was still sitting on my bag with Jaques Jencieree waiting to bring me to another reality beside the walls of the studios; walls that changes it morphic constitution in each rehearsal done after 19:00 or in each early morning after inebriating meetings with few very good friends.

There is still decisions to be taken, love to be found on the worse ways and sensual knowledge to be understand, together with my constant inconstancy and doubt of values, papers and words. There is time to wait, hurts to heal and a future that hopefully take me away from Salzburg.

Marcio Canabarro

I need to go to Israel

2011-03-17T15:55:00.000+01:00

Tirando o peso da cabeça...

2011-03-10T11:05:00.000+01:00

Ser uma consciência, ou, antes, ser uma experiência, é comunicar interiormente com o mundo, com o corpo e com os outros, ser com eles em lugar de estar ao lado deles.

Ponty - Fenomenologia da Percepção pg 142.

liquid loft

2011-02-24T13:01:00.001+01:00

Undergrowth

2011-02-22T08:00:00.000+01:00

small report

2011-02-21T08:16:00.000+01:00

The break started!

Im felling good to be in Vienna with friends, the audition with Chris Haring was fine, I went until the end, now is just wait to see what will be the results. Was very nice.

Now is wait....

wait for the liquid loft

wait for P.O.R.S.C.H.

wait for the Julyen Hamilton workshop....

So by now Im going to rehears with The Trigger Track Collective, comeback to salzburg, work on my scores and solo project, have a brazilian good friend as a guest and enjoy the few days that I still have as holiday.

Im tasty for dance now.

wonderland

2011-02-21T08:10:00.000+01:00

Hermanos Inglesos feat. MeMe - Wanderland from Kristof Luyckx on Vimeo.

reflexion

2011-02-16T21:30:00.000+01:00

Can I dance without reference?

Can I exist without refer to something?

Unique Body.

One text.

What really reference does to me?

What happened if I try to suppose different references for myself?

Is it possible to only speak about one subject without it get any past influences?

Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.

Kafka.

Sensual knowledge, isn´t it all knowledge sensual (senses)?

Art as a form of knowledge producer?

Art and original - unique experience? Original ideas?

improvise.

Open up for experience - audience and artist - going away from the option or possibility to catalog.

Rationalize?

Intuition?

Training to perceive non-linear or non-rational experiences.

Do I produce an arracional knowledge?

Confronting to fear of an experience I cannot control.

Sadness.

Bukowski.

Artistic research.

Range of choices.

Choices?

Am I betraying?

Task?

Did I felt something?

Witch are the conditions for me to expand? What is necessary?

What feels natural for me? What belongs to my nature?

Virgo with ascendence in virgo moon in gemini, shamanism animal scrawl, chinese magic square numbers 6, 8 and 3; chines

horoscope as a cow, with head on Ibegi orixas.

Confusion.

Worm up the taste for dancing?

Tripping in something tasty / natural?

How to bring this taste quickly?

Can I transform my taste?

What can takes me?

Reject.

Do I have energetic responsibility?

Can I remake history to change perspectives?

Can I contradict all my "trues" and ideas?

Can I erase my name from my personality?

Do I make any difference?

Way should I make some difference?

"You shout you aim!"

Do I hold back? In witch situations? For what?

While Im dancing should I "Go for a piece"?

Performance everywhere, lovers everywhere, grow everywhere, read everywhere, as an audience everywhere…

instant composition?

Ballet Exam.

Can I put myself on a different space/place "on the room, but on the forest". Where my dance happened?

Full dancing?

Self motivation?

Motivation letter.

Do my body wish to move by itself?

Can my body be itself instead of me?

Can I become something instead of someone and still move or be?

What last if after contradict every coma I erase all information?

How would I move?

CV.

BIO.

Artistic Statement.

Solo project.

How much is possible to push?

Cold.

Flue.

Sacrum.

What works for me?

See myself from outside what would I like to see and what could please my choreographer? Freedom?

Pain.

Audience point of view? Audience as an interpreter? Audience as a fourth volume?

Body cares.

Group opposition can help to caught the eyes?

What catch the eye? My eye? Blind.

Can things coexist?

And if from now nothing that I am or know or refer exist, means nothing, its just don't meter, it doesn't make difference, don't exist is dead. Would I move?

How it works transcendency or catharsis on it? they exist based on refer to something?

Friendship.

The Best teachers ever.

Can I unlearn something?

Can I undo?

Can I jump a year, or tree?

Can I don't use the space or time?

Do I stand behind what I do?

I don´t have profile for it.

How can I make special for me and for other people?

Give a full living thing?

Other.

Should I give signs that could be readable so my audience would be able o entering on my game?

Sharing?

Other.

Aesthetics and Politics. Sharing the sensible. Jacques Rancière.

Undergrowth.

Julyen Hamilton.

Susan Klein.

How much can I drop the conventions?

Way should I be slow in the morning?

Way should I complain about winter?

Do not judge?

Do not sleep.

Do not lose playfulness?

Beer.

Pizza.

Coffee.

Irony.

When I move now, doesn't I dance my whole history even without think?

Can I convince myself to say yes for those questions?

Can this question have some utility? Are this part of my structure?

Body structure?

I don’t think I am finite. I have my limitless desires. But from the outside I am framed

How to dont know?

rewrite.

reuse

recicle.

reflect.

Physical language is expressive or we have the tendency to make it mean?

What is the privilege to work with unnoticeable things?

Is it gravity, levity, trajectory, friction, pressure?

I have to deal with the physicality of a situation. I am constantly confronted and I have to be aware of it, because my instrument lives in this matrix.

Maurice Merleau-Ponty

With respect to the bodies of others as well as with respect to my own, I have no way of knowing the human body other than by living it - witch means to assume responsibility for the drama that flows through me and to marge my identity into it.

...

2011-02-14T17:05:00.000+01:00

I´m just wondering witch are the conditions for me to expand? What is necessary?

and what feels natural for me? What tendencies?

_______

Hamilton: I think one of the privileges when you are dancing is that you are demanded to deal with the practical situation, with the mass of the body in the solar system. It is gravity, levity, trajectory, friction, pressure. You have to deal with the physicality of a situation. You are constantly confronted and you have to be aware of it, because your instrument lives in that matrix.
We are living in a moving, not in a static world. We know the earth turns, the sun moves and so on. And in fact it really isso profoundly moving in essence. That is the situation in that you are using your tool, and the tool has, is living in and speaking through very clear laws of physics and existence on earth.
The advantage or privilege is, those laws are perceivable not only through the concepts and measurements that we have made, but also kinesthetically. It is possible to sense them again and again and again. So by essence they are dynamic laws. Even if they change by themselves again and again, it does not mean they are changing into something different. They are living.
By touching and by involving yourself in those, you are given two things: a dynamo of movement plus a calmness and ground. You are given stillness and movement at the same time. Simply because you are in sync with, you are living in that situation. When this is happening with the body, then you can start directing and playing. Just like a kid with a ball. When you know how to throw and catch it, you can set up a game. Even if you don't have many rules. Even if you don't have any rules at all. The play starts.
If there is no acceptance or a refusal of the tangible kinaesthetic (sensed again and again and again, each day, each hour, each moment,) then you have to use rules, you have to use boundaries that are completely different constructs of how to play.
The advantage, or what is on offer for a dancer, is that they are allowed to go into that deep reality and live it directly. So the movement is primarily the move of the move of the move. Later it can be used as, or placed or be composed – gesture, style, all these other things. But it is rooted in the physical situation, it is not primarily representative at all.
read more here
_____
I also keeping in mind Jacques Rancière....

2011-02-09T07:37:00.000+01:00

each something is a celebration of the nothing that supports it. (john cage)

No es el camino el que, desde la libertad, nos conduce a la percepción? (Eduardo Chillida)

My research happens in the experiential realm: dancing, standing on two feet, moving, listening and seeing. (Deborah Hay)

from Georg Blaschke web page

in - out

2011-02-08T23:59:00.000+01:00

This is a research project from Shai Faran were Julia, Zoltan, Douglas (not on the video this day) and me are collaborating. To know more about this research or about Shai you can click on her name, that is a link for her blog.

philosofy

2011-02-06T22:24:00.000+01:00

Sensual knowledge
Art as a form of knowledge producer
Art and original - unique experience? Original ideas?
Open up for experience - audience and artist - going away from the option or possibility to catalog. racionalize?
Training to persive non-linear or non-racional experiences.
Do I produce an arracional knowledge?
Confronting to fear of an experience I cannot control.
Artistic research
Automatic writing
Range of choices
choices?

There is something here starting to connect to the scores research.

2011-02-06T19:15:00.001+01:00

7 minutes

whatever

crying my misery - SCORE of the day.

2011-02-05T08:30:00.000+01:00

Image from the blog Recovering Lazyholic

Well, after all the "cliff phase", I arrive on the highest point with my catharsis of cry yesterday.

Is very true that this is my process, and there is certain beauty on the sadness and sorrow and Im allowing time to experience it, I got friend of Kafka, Nietzsche, Bukowski, Saramago and Fernando Pessoa among others...

This whole feeling was raising on the last months, I did felt the cold ground against my face. But bit by bit I getting over it. Beer, pizza and chicha helped a lot.

And to keep going on My score idea today I made a score for myself:

Start Listening to the new Bjork album while you take breakfast with who you love,

go to an art museum, a book shop, a caffe place,

by a gift for a friend,

go to supermarket,

eat good,

read,

Work in some visual-graphic manifestation.

So Im starting this score now, later I can post "possible pictures" of it.

sadnesses.tumblr.com

2011-02-01T08:14:00.000+01:00

“there is a loneliness in this world so great
that you can see it in the slow movement of
the hands of a clock.
people so tired
mutilated
either by love or no love.
people just are not good to each other
one on one.
the rich are not good to the rich
the poor are not good to the poor.
we are afraid.
our educational system tells us
that we can all be
big-ass winners.
it hasn’t told us
about the gutters
or the suicides.
or the terror of one person
aching in one place
alone
untouched
unspoken to
watering a plant.”

bukowski (via watersounds)

(via scintilla)

the day of the fuck off happening

2011-01-29T13:11:00.000+01:00

being manipulated some how....
this was the conversation from the last weeks, the impossibility to really choose what is a priority, and the need of following some rules.

thinking a bit of that I took my saturday to play scores. I will try to do this every weekend, is a good exercice to enlarge the borders of rules.

This score was sending by Costas Kekis on a skype talk. For who wants to play is very simple:
- choose a music
-put play and on the time of the music you write the score.
-just do it, do not think to much... read and if u need bring the notes with you.

If you want you can write me a score, I will try to do it and post the results here.

I think is this.

From a description of a piece this score was made.
again on the time of one music (on the dance I cheat with the time of music). But this was the first test.

ps: my run backwards is ugly.

memories on the fridge.

2011-01-29T09:15:00.000+01:00

I have so much to do, and so nothing...

Sometimes I can see myself falling on total despair.

I can really picture this, I suppose to be so happy, I suppose to love so much, there is a bunch of strangeness around.

I miss someone, something, somewhere, some feeling...

I want to go away from Salzburg, I want to clean the room, the fridge. I want a bit more light inside home... and me (?)

I want to see my brother, my father and mom.

I start to hate how I look, I start to dont follow all rules...

Maybe this sound very unfair, but I want something else.

LEA VERGINE- Body art and performance

2011-01-23T13:14:00.000+01:00

Love, as Sartre wrote, is "the desire to place oneself outside of the entire system of values that has been created by others, the necessary condition for any and all new valorizations... I am no longer permeated with finitude, nor is my being any longer immobilized in simply what I am... The possession of the transcendence of the other and, in any case, as a body".(...)

At this point, what is required of the spectator is an act of intelligence. If we find the work resistant or repulsive, there is obviously still some diaphragm to be broken before being able to complete understanding. The public is asked for an act of the will that involves an interest that is not simply esthetic...

p.22

____

Among others like susan always says is ur problem and you should get over it.

for artist and for audience.

EDGE 35.5 - WHOLE PIECE

2011-01-18T22:26:00.001+01:00

SOLO HAPPENED (?)

2011-01-16T11:34:00.000+01:00

ok.....

Lots has passing by here. The Solo project is something very controversial as project, the whole way it should work is a bit strange, but anyway I have no choice and is something that I should experience in order to graduate.

And I need to confess that has being the hardest experience that I ever had in dance.

Talk1

As until now I haven't even trying to talk with people about, because I wanted to keep it cool and positive. But holy cow is heard, so I thought to release a bit in my blog.

I have been working with Bostjan Antoncic, on a solo from "The Song" from Rosas. Well, he is an amazing dancer and person that own this solo as no body could do.... Im trying, and even though he is really inspiring this solo confront me with something beyond my possibilities.

Im trying to make it my, but physical technical and mental aspects are holding me.

Time

From 3 to 6 of november I was in Brussels learning the solo with him at Rosas studios, from the four days I rehears 3 and a half, because one of the days I got sick and eventually I ending puking a lot that day... such a shame.

Back

I came back to SEAD and start the first week of rehearsals alone. But I had forgotten that on SEAD your attention is spread around in many different things, what really took me out from the solo universe that I was starting to dive.

I got accepted for the new creation of Bodhi Project "Undergrowth" and this took me a lot of this attention...…

I was always trying to keep in mind and to keep it physical… but was just impossible to rehearse alone in the evening. I try to push and I could for 2 weeks... where I rehears for 3 days each week. Also because is heard to book studios around here....

anyway...

I got injured during the process of "Undergrowth" and I need to reduced my activities... So I spend 3 weeks going over my sacrum problem... than it came the last week of the lest session...

Totally full spaces booked and Bodhi project was preparing the first informal showing of the new production... the days were long.

X-mas

3 weeks of break.

I try to rehearse in the first week... was horrible. I felt a total collapse I couldn't hold my body, So than I direct the week for a technical work... here was Marcio trying to find the fucking standing leg.

Second week school was close.

School open in the middle of third week… and my try outs to rehearse were a shame. So we start a new session.

Now

Good teachers a bit more time, and already in the first week I could book studios just for sunday morning... Here I am...

I work for two hours I really work… and I could run the whole solo… always falling in different parts a mess.

Im glad I still have time to the performance, I just hope this time is real.

The good thing is that now I don't need to fight anymore to book a studio, because for the next week the studios are already booked for solo project.

I have a lot to work, I got to solve this... How will I do this combination of everything that sounds impossible for me?

Brain

From the beginning Ive being thinking a lot about this solo, is time to let the body do!! aaaaaaaaa

Leg

Indeed my standing leg got a bit better during this whole stuff.

Talk2

I should send a video for Bostjan... I was thinking in record today, but I didn't dare to do it I just could not run it from the beginning to the end, and I try. Plus that all this sound even to me a lot of excuses. But it really happened.

Shit Happened.

...

2011-01-14T22:12:00.000+01:00

Undergrowth premiere 26.1.11

2011-01-12T08:05:00.000+01:00

2nd day 3rd session Going-On yeear

2011-01-11T21:09:00.000+01:00

The body is a part of every perception. It is the immediate past in so far as it still emerges in the present that flees away from it. This means that is at one and the same time a point of view and a point of departure that I am and I also go beyond as I move off towards what I must become. (Jean-Paul Sartre)

Today after all classes I arrived home wanting to dance....

from the laundry room...

2011-01-08T10:51:00.000+01:00

I was thinking in write something... I know that usually Im a prolix person... in motion, thoughts and words. And well... I even don't know what to write, Im just feeling a bit bored today, I don't know if is missing inputs or missing a closure time. Sometimes I wander if I can stop to be busy in my mind.

In general as a normal being Im trying to discover, I spend my time wondering about things, but I don't know if this is being so helpful... Anyway...

I think is just this unsure of the next... Once this year I finish SEAD.

I really don't know what to do next.

Where to go. Im really trying to let it go and see what will happened.

Is a bit difficult to do it. I get myself "sometimes" a "bit" worried about.

Well... I sure I want to keep dancing. I just hope that my work and my luck contribute for this keep happening.

anyway...

Im feeling so empty somehow.

well maybe I just need to be quiet.

2011-01-04T17:04:00.000+01:00

So empty...

How much can I thought my thoughts?

2011-01-03T14:10:00.000+01:00

Thinking on my and other thoughts I found this quote in between my old notes:
"With respect to the bodies of others as well as with respect to my own, I have no way of knowing the human body other than by living it - witch means to assume responsibility for the drama that flows through me and to marge my identity into it." (Maurice Merleau-Ponty)
And than? I have fun being lost inside myself.
Feels good be on studio again.

WHAT TO DO ON 2011?

2011-01-01T11:50:00.000+01:00

DANCE!

whatever come will be good I just want to dance...

no plans beside this.

let´s see what it brings.

ps: such a nice number the date today.

References Contradiction and some stuff

2010-12-31T14:01:00.000+01:00

Can we dance without reference? Can we exist without refer to something?

What really reference does to us? What happened if I try to suppose different references for myself? Is it possible to only speak about one subject without it get any past influences? Can I remake history to change perspectives? Can I contradict all my "trues" and ideas? Can I erase my name from my personality? Do the information: virgo with ascendence in virgo moon in gemini, shamanism animal scrawl, chinese magic square been numbers 6, 8 and 3; chines

horoscope as a cow, with head on Ibegi orixas; describe really what I move from?

And if from now nothing that I am or know or refer exist, means nothing, its just don't meter, it doesn't make difference, don't exist is dead. Would I move?

How it works transcendency or catharsis on it? they exist based on refer to something? Can movement exist without referential contradicting Newton, science or any sure aspect? and for what?

and way?

Can I unlearn something? Can I undo? Can I jump a year, or tree? Can I don't use the space or time?

Do my body wish to move by itself? Can my body be itself instead of me? Can I become something instead of someone and still move or be? What last if after contradict every coma we erase all information? How would I move?

When I move now doesn't I dance my whole history even without think? Can I convince myself to say yes for those questions? Can this question have some utility? Are this part of my structure? Body structure?

How to dont know?

Yasmeen I love u!

2010-12-28T23:55:00.000+01:00

eyeland from 2008

2010-12-20T20:47:00.000+01:00

:)))

2010-12-16T09:57:00.000+01:00

NOW I WANT TO DANCE

Ironia perfeita

Dezembro 16, 2010 por Fundação José Saramago

Fernando Pessoa é o irónico por excelência. E toda essa invenção dos heterónimos é uma obra-prima de ironia. Esse dotar de voz própria ao conjunto de “eus” que convivem em cada um de nós parece-me a ironia perfeita.

“Saramago: ‘La CE, un eufemismo”, El Independiente, Madrid, 29 de Agosto de 1987
In José Saramago nas Suas Palavras

THE IRONY WILL SAVE US!

2010-12-16T09:32:00.000+01:00

When you feel powerless in front of situations remember:

The irony will save us!

When discuss is something that no longer has sense because of a clear stupid hierarchy, remember:

The irony will save us!

When your head depend of just another head, remember:

The irony will save us!

When you fell like crying because a dumb with no administrative knowledge takes care of an organization of art, remember: maybe it really have a respectful artistic view point... but than you realize: Shit! There is something wrong here this is a sham artistic statement. And this coconut will never open. Than you need to remember:

The irony will save us!

Don't get used with mess and frustrated artists, because in the end is your own problem; remember:

The irony will save us!

So ball your head, Smile, think in Maquiavel, charge, fuck it, get exited and remember:

THE IRONY WILL SAVE US!

______________________

ai ai therapy!

I hope they like me

2010-12-15T10:40:00.000+01:00

On the present I have been treating movement as something totally referential, that turning through perception has the possibility of become dance; if the watcher is seen the poetry of it. Because of that my interests and research are growing towards improvisation and perception on the last years.

Perception as the way we make the world exist for us, in the images, cognition, connections or disconnection that create our sense and make us wandering about things and create. I believe that dance depend on the perception, on the references to exist. To create something beyond the mechanics of moving. This beyond by now I have been understanding as the inclusion of the other; agreeing also with the words of Julyen Hamilton. Other conclusion beside our conclusions, other forms beside our form, other thoughts beside our thoughts. For me there is a constant need of discovery, sharing and refining.

I believe that one pathway to allow the other to exist on its poesy, is digging and tunneling deep into the body. Go for the body in my case is to recognize and explore the material in witch I am working and I am made from; there is a certain clarity that this exploration creates and help when improvisation is chosen as a principle of performance. Allowing myself to listening to it, is becoming not only choose it as an art form but as an art way.

Trough Improvisation I confront myself if I really can experience the intelligence of the moment or the speed of thoughts. If is one of the ways I found to release information. if can I see how knowledge travels and make borders blurred. If I can imagine what an improvisation event will look like, is it truly an improvisation. If does improvisation enable a unity of body and mind. If In witch level does decision making happened. If do we have an Unique experience…

Until now all those investigations have giving me valuable tools and doubts to discuss and share. And contribute to my dance. I feel that as much I handle my body I notice that Im allowing a certain autonomy to born.

Artists as Christian Rizzo, Yasmeen Godder, Julyen Hamilton, Jonathan Burrows and Mag Stuart have been very inspiring for me. They evoke on me not only admiration but lots of questions and hugger to research.

Ballet "Reflexion" on a asem throath

2010-12-14T23:05:00.000+01:00

Ballet report
Newton and I have been considering movement as something totally referential, that turning through perception has the possibility of become dance, if the watcher is seen the poetry of it.

In dance there is something beyond the mechanics or reasons way the movements exist. This beyond by now I understand as the inclusion of the other. Is the possibility to allow other thoughts beside our thoughts. Other conclusion beside our conclusions, other forms beside our form, other images beside our images, other invitation beside our desires…

I fell this especially because in the last three years I became more and more interest in improvisation, for the reediness, for the presence, for the alertness, for the texture, for the fact that deals with the true of the body.

And I believe that the pathway to allow the Other to exist on its poesy, is digging and tunneling deep into the body. As an sculptor that is aware of the material in witch he will work, listening to the choices this matter gives him, allowing from insidethe rock or whatever material combination the sculpture to born.

Go for the body in my case is to recognize and explore the material in witch I am working and I am made from. Allow myself to listening to it, is not only choose it as an art form but as an art way.

This relation put me on a quite calm zone regarding ballet. Specially after six months without any practice on this movement code, I could comeback to classes and realize that my body is still working and information is still sinking.

I truly believe that was definitely not my research in Ballet (that don't exist) that make me improve bodywaise. I feel that for all this time the hunger on contemporary discussions and body propositions gave me, the possibility to listening and recognize what really serves what and for what.

My other practices than ballet made the ballet technique better, something that didn't happened at all on the other way around. It took me time, but I happy in realize that in a very personal level, at the present I am living in, that I will not comeback to a ballet class after graduate as a training options.

I want more.

I do believe that ballet can be very good for any kind of improvement, in my case was good to confronting myself with new questions about time, behavior, structure, reasons, method, aesthetic and way of caring body. I feel glad to realize that discussions like that have been fundamental during the period I have being training and learning at SEAD.

But I allow myself to do not need ballet to raise questions of being anymore. I found a certain autonomy. Now I do have strong interests and is not a matter of deny the benefits of ballet, is just recognizing which were this benefits for me. And of course technically with luck I do 3 piruetes once a week .

From all discoveries come my calmness.

In addition to that I would like to thanks Janice, even though I had just few classes with her, but were the ones that worth it the most during this 5 weeks; for being one of the two ballet teachers that I believe that do a serious and intelligent work towards contemporary dancers really respecting the body, holding and owning knowledge and information on a level that goes beyond the technic. Something that make me very inspired. And a good teacher is the one that can inspired students to research and find their own ways through motion.

For today this is my referential point.

Marcio Canabarro

Going on

Other - Action of Spontaneity

2010-12-12T23:09:00.000+01:00

Newton in his first low already propose that movement is a referential issue.

Movement also can be seen by an audience and can be turn throughout perception into dance, if they are seen the poetry of it.

Because there is something from beyond the mechanics of it for the reasons way the actions existing. And maybe what is beyond is the inclusion of the other.

Is the possibility to allow other thoughts beside our thoughts. Other conclusion beside our conclusions, other forms beside our form, other images beside our images, other invitation beside our desires…

And one of the pathways for allow the other to exist on movement and on its poesy is digging deep on the body. To recognize and explore the material in witch we work and we are made from.Allow ourselves to listening to it, is not only choose it as an art form but as an art way.

Your own. Your own body, your own feelings, your own thoughts, your own spirit, your own spontaneity. All experiences, all culture, all ways to relate with the moment, to the now instant, to ways to relate to imagination.

And space always seen to welcome and in that level welcoming the other too. And (re)charge.